Love Affairs Without Love Songs [Matt]

Matt was used to being moved from one charge to another, it came with the territory of being a Guardian and having to protect those who were most in danger, but Matt’s latest charge was one that he hadn’t expected at all. He and Ana had met when they were both already a few drinks in and one thing had led to another. He hadn’t planned on spending the night with her but the attraction he felt for her was something that he just hadn’t been able to fight in the state he was in and if he was honest he hadn’t wanted to either. Their paths had crossed again a few times after that and every time the result was the same, he ended up spending the night at her place and they both got something that they needed out of it. It was only meant to be no strings attached fun but then he was given his new assignment and that was when Matt had realised that somewhere along the line something had changed for him. He had wanted to protest when Jensen had given him the assignment, he had come so close to telling his boss about what had been going on between him and Ana but he hadn’t been able to bring himself to do that. Jensen was a mentor to him as well as his boss and he was also a friend so Matt knew that he didn’t want to let him down. Instead he had accepted the assignment and even though he and Ana hadn’t talked about it, they both knew that they had to keep things professional from now on.

Unfortunately that was easier said than done because Matt had realised too late that he had developed feelings for her and being assigned to protect her meant that they had more time than ever to start getting to know each other. Matt had known about Ana’s family already considering that he had been at Hogwarts with some of them and he knew that Ana needed him to look out for her so he was doing his best to bury everything that he was feeling deep down and just focus on keeping her alive but there were still times when that was easier said than done. The pitch was well protected so Matt knew that technically he didn’t have to stay while Ana trained but that day he had decided to stay put. He had given in before when she’d told him that he hadn’t had to stick around so he’d gone and helped with some patrols in the nearby area for the duration of her practice but when he’d returned she hadn’t been there and he really had been beside himself with worry. Matt knew that it was his job to protect her considering that he was her Guardian but it was more than that, the truth was that the thought of something bad happening to her was enough to make him sick to his stomach and it would have been the same even if he hadn’t been assigned to look out for her.

Watching the team practice wasn’t actually that bad and it helped that he was friends with the captain. Had he not been then he wouldn’t have been surprised if Summer had told him to get lost but as it was he wasn’t the kind of person who would give away any of the team’s secrets and thankfully she knew that. They went back a long way and even though he had initially protested when she and Ana had decided to try and convince him to join them for a while after the rest of the team had gone home, now he was glad that he’d ended up listening to them because the truth was that he’d had a lot of fun. Ever since he’d joined the Guardians he had been throwing himself into his work so much, even more so after his sister had died, and it was easy to forget that he was still young and should be relaxing and having some fun every now and then. Matt knew that he had become a little uptight but he really had loosened up while he’d been messing around with Ana and Summer and the truth was that he wanted things to stay like this for as long as possible. Too soon Summer was leaving though, and that meant that just Matt and Ana remained. Even while they were messing around he had remained as observant as ever but the spells and wardings that had been put up around the pitch meant that he didn’t need to worry as much as he normally would and that was a relief to say the least. He knew that they weren’t really meant to stay there after everyone else had left but Ana didn’t seem to want to go just yet either so Matt found himself nodding. “Sure, we can stay here for a while,” he confirmed, flying back down to the ground and setting his broom down before lying on the grass next to it with his arms behind his head and looking up at the sky, his ears still listening out for the sound of any footsteps approaching or any other sound that might pose a threat even though he seemed completely relaxed. A part of him hoped that Ana might curl up against him but he knew that he shouldn’t be thinking about that, not now they had agreed to keep it professional. “I forgot how peaceful it could be out here,” he admitted with a sigh before shifting position slightly so he could look at Ana. “You really are incredible, you know,” he added before quickly clearing his throat as he knew that that was dangerous territory. “Have you got anything planned for your day off?”

ANASTASIA MARISSA BELACQUA

Matt had never thought that he would be in this position, that he would be assigned to protect someone that he had feelings for. One of the first things that was drilled into the Guardians was that they weren’t meant to get too attached to the people they were assigned to protect because eventually they would be reassigned and it wasn’t always easy to keep in touch. It was one of those things, though, when you spent so much time with people it was difficult not to forge some of those connections but even so romances between Guardians and their charges were meant to be forbidden. Matt didn’t doubt that his boss wouldn’t be happy if he found out how Matt felt about Ana and the truth was that he was doing his best to bury those feelings as deep down as possible. Matt had never been very good with relationships and he knew that he couldn’t afford to be distracted if he ended up getting his heart broken. Ana was his charge and if it came down to it then he would give up his life to protect her but he couldn’t let himself love her and yet he would be lying if he said that he wasn’t struggling. He knew that he could be asked to be reassigned but at the same time he knew that he didn’t want to have to rely on anyone else protecting her. If he was looking out for her then he wouldn’t have to worry because he knew that he would do whatever he had to in order to protect her so all he could do was keep on as he was and hope that his feelings for her might one day pass.

It was still good to have moments like this where they could just relax before snapping back to reality, he knew that he should insist that they leave now that practice was over but Matt couldn’t blame Ana for wanting to stay in the bubble that the quidditch pitch offered for a little longer. Matt was always on the alert but laying back on the grass now he felt more at ease than he had done for a long time and if he was honest he knew that he could do with more moments like this. “I can’t blame you for that, to be honest I used to do the same after my matches at Hogwarts. There’s just something special about the peace that falls over the pitch ones the roaring crowds are gone, there’s nothing quite like it,” Matt admitted. He had definitely made the most of it back then so he could understand why Ana did the same thing. “You work so hard all the time, you deserve moments like this when you can get them.” They didn’t come along too often but that practice had been a particularly difficult one and even though they’d had some time messing around with Summer afterwards it just wasn’t quite the same.

As Ana said that he was the incredible one, Matt shook his head. “No, that title definitely belongs to you. When some people learn that they’re in enough danger to warrant Guardian protection they lose it. They shut themselves away and stop truly living their lives but you haven’t done that. You’re not letting it control your life and that’s really admirable.” He had seen it go both ways and he was glad that Ana was one of those people who took it in her stride. As Ana explained what she had planned for her day off, Matt found himself nodding before his expression softened as Ana said that she’d thought about cooking him dinner as an apology for scaring him. “You have nothing to apologise for,” he assured her. He couldn’t deny that he had felt really worried that something had happened to Ana when he had returned to the pitch and found that she wasn’t there but he was the one who was meant to worry about her, not the other way around, and he knew that he didn’t want her to let what had happened change anything. It was why he now refused to leave her alone at the pitch but that was his decision and it was the way that he should have been doing things all along. “I don’t really have anything I need to do so if you’re not sick of me then we could always spend a day hanging out if you like,” he offered, knowing that he would feel better about doing that than leaving Ana alone anyway. “I know your place is as safe as it can be but I still don’t like the thought of leaving you alone. If you would rather have the day to yourself so you can have people round then I can make myself scarce though,” he added. He would be lying if he said that the thought of Ana having a guy over was enough to make him jealous but he couldn’t stand in her way if that was what she wanted because more than anything he wanted her to be happy.

ANASTASIA MARISSA BELACQUA

Matt wasn’t used to quiet moments like this. Being a Guardian meant that he always had to be on the alert, looking for danger around every corner, but right now he didn’t have to worry about that and the truth was that there were times when he wasn’t even sure that he really knew how to relax anymore. He knew that he was still punishing himself for what had happened to his sister but he couldn’t stop no matter how hard he tried. He still blamed himself for not being there to save her even though he knew that there was no way that he could have been without leaving his charges and fellow Guardian in the lurch. It didn’t matter that years had passed, the fact that he hadn’t been able to save her was still so raw. He had lost charges before because there were some things that even he couldn’t save them from but his sister was the one person he had lost that he had truly cared about and he knew that he didn’t want to go through the pain of losing someone like that again. Ana was getting dangerously close to that territory, it would be easy to give into the feelings he had for her but he knew that he couldn’t do that. Instead he had to bury them deep down and pretend that they didn’t even exist. They had slept together a few times before he was assigned to become her Guardian and there were times when he wondered whether Jensen could see the burning connection between the two of them but if he could he hadn’t said anything and for that Matt truly was grateful because he knew that he wouldn’t want anyone else protecting Ana, not even the Guardian he trusted the most. At least with him he could be certain that she was safe and that was enough to put his mind at ease a little at least. Playing quidditch had been a nice distraction for a little while and were it not for the fact that Matt knew that the Enlightened had thrown the world into chaos then he might have been able to convince himself that the rest of the world was just like their little bubble here.

“There’s a lot you don’t know about me,” Matt said, a half smile forming on his lips as he turned his head and looked at Ana. He knew that his assignment to her was only while she needed him and he could be pulled from her protection detail at any moment if Jensen ordered it so he wasn’t meant to get attached but he just couldn’t help it. It was so easy for him to slip into the Matt he was before he became a Guardian at times around Ana and that was a guy that he hadn’t been since his sister had died. In a way it was a little bittersweet because he knew that his sister had loved the version of him she had known while he was a student and he knew that it was perhaps about time that he started letting that side of him see the light of day a little more often. “I played as Beater for a couple of years but Seeker was always my favourite position. I’ve always thrived under pressure,” he admitted. It had been that way for as long as he could remember and it certainly served him well now. “What drew you to being a Keeper?” he asked, unable to deny that he was curious not to mention it was normally easier for him when Ana talked about herself rather than the other way around. “If you ever need me to have a word with her I will, I might be able to talk her into taking it a little easier on you guys,” he chuckled. It was a long shot of course but he knew that he would definitely give it a try if Ana wanted him to. “Is everything okay with her?” he asked, unable to deny that he had felt like perhaps there was something going on that she wasn’t saying.

“Some people would have done exactly that but you’ve never struck me as the kind of person who would give in to that fear,” Matt said gently. She was so much stronger than she gave herself credit for and Ana might not be able to see that but he definitely could. “I’m glad I was assigned to look out for you as well. I know it wasn’t easy for you at first but thank you for being as great about this as you have been,” he added. He’d dealt with charges in the past who had been happy to try and give him the slip or who had made his life generally difficult in other ways but Ana wasn’t long that at all. In fact she was the most considerate charge he’d ever had and he was grateful to her for that. She made his job that much easier and even though he knew that he was being paid to protect her the truth was that it didn’t feel that way a lot of the time and there was a part of him that knew that he would do this for her even if he wasn’t getting paid. Ana meant a lot to him, more than he could ever admit to himself let alone her or anyone else, and he knew that he would do whatever he had to in order to protect her. “It sounds like you’re stuck with me then,” Matt said, a smile touching his lips as Ana said that she didn’t mind hanging out with him. Truth be told he had lost touch with a lot of his friends after he graduated from Hogwarts and even more after his sister died and since then his job had become his life so he wasn’t so sure he would know what to really do with some free time if he had it anyway. He quickly realised that Ana might not actually want to spend the day with him, though, so he was quick to offer to find something else to do even if he knew deep down that he would probably end up helping with patrols rather than actually having a day off. She seemed genuine when she said that they could hang out together, though, and he nodded before his cheeks flushed red as she said they could hang out at his place if it made it feel more like a day off for him. “We could get some food in and there is a couch but it is pretty old so it isn’t very comfortable. To be honest my place is a bit of a shoebox so yours might be better,” he said at last. It was all he could afford since he sent money to his mum to help her out when he could and being a Guardian meant that he didn’t really get to spend much time there anyway. His apartment was actually pretty sparse and didn’t really look like anyone lived in it so the idea of Ana seeing it was embarrassing to say the least. His bed was comfortable and images flashed through his mind of Ana lying there with him but he knew that he couldn’t think about that. He was doing his best to push those thoughts from his mind when Ana gestured for him to stay where he was before shifting closer to him. Moments later she was lying next to him with her head in her chest and she turned to look at him to ask if it was okay. In that moment they weren’t on the quidditch pitch any longer, they were back to lying in bed together after one of their nights together and even though every fibre of his being was screaming at him saying that he shouldn’t do it, the urge was far too strong when she was so close to him like this. Instead of answering her his eyes met hers and he hooked a finger under Ana’s chin before leaning forward and kissing her. So much for burying those feelings, huh?

ANASTASIA MARISSA BELACQUA

While he was at Hogwarts Matt had had a lot of friends around him. He used to be a part of the popular crowd and he had thrived in that environment but after graduation everything had changed. All of his friends had moved away and Matt’s job had become his life. He would be the first to admit that he had taken certain things for granted like having his younger sister around but he had received a harsh wakeup call the day she had died. He hadn’t been able to be there for her the way he should have been, the family he was protecting was attacked at the same time that his sister had needed him and even though he had saved the family, he still felt like a failure because he hadn’t been there for his sister. Ever since then he had struggled letting anyone get close to him and that hadn’t changed. Ana was the one person who had ended up getting under his skin and he couldn’t deny that it had been good to see Summer again and let off some steam with an old friend but soon enough he knew that it would be back to normality once more. As Ana said that they should change the fact that she didn’t know a lot about him, Matt grimaced. “I’m really not that interesting, trust me,” he assured her. Truth be told he didn’t even know how to open up about Karina, it was something that he had kept buried ever since she died and he wasn’t sure that that was going to change any time soon. As she spoke again, Matt couldn’t help but laugh. “What can I say, I like to be in control as much as I can be,” he chuckled. Playing as seeker meant that he was the one who ended the game most of the time and that was something that he had always liked. Matt listened intently as Ana explained how she got into quidditch and he felt a smile touch his lips. “Keeper is definitely the best position for you, I know what you’re like,” he teased. “That sounds like a fun way to get started though, I bet you’re glad you did,” he added. If she hadn’t done then she wouldn’t have ended up playing professionally and Matt couldn’t imagine her doing anything else right now. “Of course it is, it makes it a bit easier having to protect three hoops,” he chuckled. Ana’s job was just as difficult as any other and Matt knew that but he couldn’t resist teasing her nonetheless. “Yeah I would,” he grinned as Ana asked if he would risk fireballs being thrown at him. He left off the part about the fact that he would do anything for her because that wasn’t something that he could admit even to himself right now. As Ana explained about Mia, Matt nodded. “They didn’t always get along but they loved each other. Losing her would have hit Summer hard,” he said gently. He knew the pain of losing a sibling all too well, it was never going to be easy. “I’m sure she wouldn’t mind you reaching out, she has always had Isabella but she could probably use another friend.”

Truth be told Matt could probably use a friend to talk to himself but that had never really been his style. He always had a habit of bottling things up and it hadn’t changed as he got older. Being a Guardian meant that he didn’t have much time to think about himself anyway so it was just one of those things. His job meant the world to him but truth be told he was glad that he had been assigned to protect Ana. He knew that she needed it and he would be lying if he said he hadn’t become protective of her after they had started hooking up. That was meant to be so far behind them now but the truth was that it was something that Matt still thought about often. He really liked Ana and that was something that wasn’t meant to have happened. He knew that it was dangerous, if his boss found out then he would probably be reassigned and he might not get the chance to see her again so he knew that it was just another thing that he had to keep buried. “I’ll always have your back, I can promise you that,” he assured her gently. “I’m not going to let anything happen to you.” He had already lost one person he loved when he lost Karina and even though he wasn’t sure if that’s what this feeling was, he knew that it was certainly something that he hadn’t felt before and he knew that he didn’t want to lose her. “I know you do and I appreciate it more than you know,” he promised. Having Ana go along with what he told her definitely made life that much easier and he was grateful to her for that, especially since he’d had charges in the past who were less willing to comply. “I really don’t know how you do it,” he chuckled. He knew that he probably wasn’t particularly fun to hang out with but she seemed happy to do it anyway and that really did mean a lot to him.

Matt knew that Ana would have done what she’d said and stayed at his place if he had wanted to take a day off but the truth was that he wasn’t sure what he would have done with that much free time on his hands. It wasn’t something he’d had for a long time and Matt knew that being left alone with his thoughts was dangerous so he knew that he would much rather avoid that if he could. “Alright, deal,” Matt nodded as Ana said that he could control the television and pick the meal. He knew that chances were he would probably still go for something that she liked out of habit because he wanted her to be happy but he wasn’t going to tell her that and he certainly wouldn’t say no to a massage. As she spoke again and he let out a groan. “You’re killing me here, you know that?” he asked. He was doing his best not to blur the lines between personal and professional and she wasn’t making it easy for him at all. He knew he should have told her to stop when she moved so that her head was laying on his chest, if anyone saw them like this and it ended up being reported back to his boss then he knew that he could be in big trouble. He needed to put his foot down and put an end to this now but he would be lying if he said that he hadn’t thought about the nights they had spent together a lot since he had been assigned to her. They shouldn’t end up there again but that didn’t mean that he didn’t want to, not by a long shot. Matt knew that he should have moved on from Ana by now but the truth was that he hadn’t and it wasn’t long before he was kissing her. Ana could have pulled away but she didn’t, instead she returned the kiss and Matt pulled her even closer to him so he could deepen the kiss.

ANASTASIA MARISSA BELACQUA

There was a part of Matt that felt bad about keeping his personal life to himself but he wasn’t sure whether Ana remembered him from Hogwarts or whether she had heard about what had happened to Karina after he graduated and if she hadn’t then he knew that he wanted to keep it that way for at least a little longer. He knew that Ana wouldn’t judge him for not being able to save his sister but he wasn’t sure that he was ready to see the look of pity in her eyes. He would much rather keep quiet and focus on being her Guardian as opposed to his own personal life because that was so much easier. For the last three years of his time at Hogwarts he had played as Seeker for Gryffindor while Ana had played as Keeper for Hufflepuff and the truth was that he hadn’t played since then so he was rusty to say the least but it had still been good to mess around with Ana and Summer for a while nonetheless. Matt would be the first to admit that he wasn’t good at dealing with his personal traumas so he could understand why Summer was having her team train as hard as they were right now. It was her way of coping and that was something that Matt could definitely understand. His way of coping was by focusing on his work but he also had to try and ignore how he felt about Ana and that was starting to prove to be much more difficult than it had been before as the two of them spent more time together like this. “There’s definitely no secret kid, I can promise you that,” Matt chuckled before rolling his eyes playfully. He knew how much Ana loved to spoil her friends’ kids, he had seen it firsthand during the time he had been working with her, and he would be lying if he said that there weren’t times when he wondered what Ana as a mum might look like. “Have you ever thought about having a kid of your own?” Matt asked. He knew that Ana wasn’t seeing anyone right now which meant he didn’t have to worry about the jealousy he was sure to feel when she did start seeing someone but there were other ways she could become a mum if she wanted to. Ana was still young so she had plenty of time to think about that but he couldn’t deny that he was curious. “You’re theirs as well, I’ve seen it,” he said, a smile touching his lips as Ana said that the girls were her rocks. She was there for the two of them just as much and Matt knew that they were lucky to have her. “I’m glad you have them in your corner.”

Matt couldn’t help but laugh as Ana said he was sweet risking his looks for her. “As if I don’t do that on a daily basis already,” he chuckled. His job meant that he was always on the front lines and he had already seen that anything could happen. If he was honest his looks didn’t bother him these days considering he didn’t even have time to date so he really wasn’t bothered about anything like that happening to him. It was good to hear Ana call him handsome though, that much he couldn’t deny, and he didn’t even try to conceal his smile. Things had changed between them from when they first met, back then Matt had only been interested in hooking up with Ana so he could feel something for a while and block out the pain of losing his sister that he still carried with them. Now his sole focus had to be on protecting her and he was determined to do just that. That didn’t mean that he couldn’t at least try and make things a little better for her at the same time, though, and he nodded as Ana said that Summer seemed so intense all the time. “She can be but she’s also still human,” he said gently before feeling his heart clench as Ana said that she couldn’t imagine losing a sibling. “There’s nothing worse, believe me,” he nodded. “Especially if you couldn’t be there to help them when they needed you.” That part at least was more about Karina than Mia, his own sadness choosing that moment to shine through, but he hoped Ana wouldn’t notice.

So far she was proving to be the charge he’d had who was the easiest to protect. Matt knew that Ana took having him assigned to protect her seriously and she didn’t push the boundaries the way that some people did. He had dealt with people who had constantly tried to slip away from him in the past and he had dealt with others who had been openly hostile towards him. Matt had grown used to never knowing that he was going to get from one charge to the next and he might have thought that perhaps their encounter before he was assigned to protect her might have played a part in it but deep down he knew that Ana was just the kind of person who wanted to make things better for those around her. She didn’t go out too often so he wouldn’t have to worry about her so much and she always did whatever he told her to do without question. Matt knew that he had another reason for wanting to keep her safe, if he was honest he wasn’t sure that he could stand to lose her too, but he had to keep reminding himself that he was only assigned to protect her while there was an active threat against her. Once that subsided he would be moved on to his next charge and that was just the way it went. As she spoke, Matt felt a smile touch his lips. “I’d already figured that out before I was assigned to protect you,” he said, unable to stop himself from teasing her right back although it also happened to be true. Ana was beautiful and there were times when Matt wasn’t so sure that Ana saw it herself but he definitely did. “I wouldn’t restrict your movements, you should know that,” he said gently. “You’ve already given up so much since I was assigned to you but you don’t have to keep on doing it. You’re allowed to have a life, to go out with your friends, to date, to have a life. I know you like trying to make my life easier but don’t worry about me. I’m a Guardian, it’s my job to adapt,” he assured her. It was better for Ana to restrict her movements but at the same time he didn’t want her to look back on this period of her life one day and have any regrets.

The same was meant to be true of Matt on his days off but the truth was that he would rather spend the day with Ana. He knew that as a Guardian he wasn’t meant to get too attached to his charge but she meant a lot to him and he really didn’t like the thought of leaving her alone even if only for one day. He would much rather just lounge around and spend time with her and he was glad that she seemed to be happy to go along with that too. Ana had tried getting him to relax and watch or eat what he wanted while he was at her place but he never took her up on it so it might end up being a bit of a challenge to do that when they spent their day off together but he knew that he was going to have to try. As Ana spoke again, Matt shook his head. “No, you said it was optional, not that it wasn’t included,” he corrected. He always tried his best to behave whenever he was around Ana because he knew that the last thing he wanted was for anyone, including Ana, thinking that he was taking advantage of her. He was her Guardian and he was meant to protect her with his life and he would give that up for her in an instant. It didn’t change the way that he felt about her, though, nothing seemed able to do that right now and it was becoming more and more difficult to ignore that. It wasn’t long before that point was proved when Matt kissed Ana and his hands found her waist as she eliminated the remaining space between them and kissed him back. Right now Matt was acting on instinct, unable to have Ana resting against him like that without kissing her, but as she pulled back he realised what he had done and the apology was on the tip of his tongue just as Ana told him she would slap him if he tried. “I’m your Guardian, Ana. It could be seen as me taking advantage of you. I don’t want to take advantage of you,” he sighed before his breath caught in his throat as she said she wanted him between kisses. Matt knew that he needed to stay strong and stop this but he didn’t want to and his eyes met hers once more. “I want you too,” he breathed even as a voice in the back of his mind told him again that he shouldn’t be doing this, a voice that was quickly being drowned out by his desire for Ana.

ANASTASIA MARISSA BELACQUA

Matt knew there were Guardians who had lives outside of their job, his boss was married and had a child and others were in the same position, but it wasn’t like that for him. He had thrown himself into being a Guardian ever since he took the job but after Karina died he had let it consume his life completely. He knew that it was easier to distract himself with work than it was to have time to think about the fact that his sister was gone and he hadn’t been able to save her. He was entitled to days off and holiday time since there were other Guardians who could step in to cover for him but the last day he’d taken off was the day he met Ana. He knew it wasn’t particularly healthy but it was the only way he knew how to cope and the truth was that he wasn’t sure he wanted to try dating again. His heart had never really been in it while he was at Hogwarts and his last girlfriend had ended up cheating on him but deep down he knew that it was more than that. Ever since that first night they spent together it was Ana that his thoughts always came back to and he knew that whoever he ended up with would only be compared to her which wasn’t fair on anyone. It had been easier for him to embark on one night stands when he did have some free time on his hands but he had no desire to do that right now either. Ana was his focus even if it was as her Guardian as opposed to the way he wanted it to be. “Maybe one day there will but right now it’s just me,” Matt shrugged. He had never given too much thought to becoming a dad but there was a part of him that liked the idea. He knew just how dangerous a place the world could be but he knew that if it did happen then he would protect his child with everything he had just like he did his charges. “You wouldn’t have to stay locked up in your home,” he assured her. “Another Guardian would come and take my place for as long as I was off for but in case you haven’t noticed, days off aren’t something I like to have,” he said, offering her a small smile as he looked over at her. He had turned down the offer of a day off not too long ago and he knew that he wasn’t in a hurry to have too much free time on his hands. As Ana said that she didn’t have a lot of time for dating with practice and then mentioned the attack, Matt’s expression softened. “Practice is one thing but don’t let what happened to you put you off dating, there are ways we could make it work. You deserve to be happy.” With me he wanted to add to the end of that sentence but he knew that he couldn’t. If anyone found out what had happened between him and Ana before he became her Guardian then he could be taken off her assignment and he knew that he didn’t want to have to rely on anyone else looking after her.

“I could argue that protecting you could come in many different forms, even saving you from an overenthusiastic captain,” Matt said, a half smile forming on his face as he looked over at her. It was always so easy to be around Ana, she was pretty much the only person that he could be himself with other than Summer these days and it was something that he knew better than to take for granted. He knew that he was only with her in a professional capacity, he could be given a different assignment at any time and someone could come in to replace him or they could find those responsible for attacking Ana and the threat against her would end but right now he was needed and he knew that he would stay with her for as long as he could. “Right,” he nodded as Ana said that Summer was a human who could throw fireballs and whose hair changed colours. As she said it almost sounded like he was speaking from experience about losing a sibling, Matt hesitated for a moment. Less than a handful of people knew what had happened with Karina and talking about it was never easy but Ana knew very little about his life and he knew that he didn’t want to keep this a secret from her. “I am,” he said at last instead. “It was just me, my sister Karina and our mum while we were growing up but our mum wasn’t a fit parent so even before my letter arrived I had to provide for us and I pretty much raised Karina. She started pulling away as we got older and fell in with a bad crowd. A few years ago she called me on a night out but I couldn’t answer because the family I was protecting was attacked. By the time I’d taken care of the threat against them, my sister was already gone. I saved them but I couldn’t save her,” he said, his voice shaking as he spoke and he quickly cleared his throat and blinked away the tears that had formed in his eyes. “That’s how I know how Summer feels.” Losing a sibling was awful and it was something that he really wouldn’t wish on anyone.

As Ana explained what things were like for her now, Matt’s expression softened. “Listen, I know we don’t know who attacked you yet but you know I’m never going to let them hurt you again, right?” he asked gently. “You really don’t need to worry about that. I understand that you don’t want to go out after a long practice and that’s fair enough but don’t let who attacked you stop you from living your life.” Whatever Ana decided to do he knew that he would be there for her and there was no way that he was going to let anyone get close to her who could hurt her. Not only was it his job as her Guardian to protect her but he was pretty sure that his heart couldn’t take it if he lost her. Ana meant more to him than he could even admit to himself and he rolled his eyes playfully as she said that it sounded like he was trying to get the happy ending she had offered. “I’d be crazy not to want it but we can’t, that’s why you’re killing me by offering,” he said, his heart leaping in his chest as their eyes met. He knew that nothing could happen between them but that didn’t mean that he didn’t want it to and as Ana said that she wanted it just as much, he believed her. “We can’t,” he breathed even though there was no conviction in his words. It was more like he was trying to tell himself that than anything else but the way Ana’s lips felt as they moved against his was enough to remove those thoughts from his mind completely. He wanted this, he wanted her and even though Matt knew that it could cost him his job he knew that he was powerless to resist. His lips met Ana’s once more after she pulled her shirt off and he only broke the kiss so he could remove his shirt as well. He knew that they were still out on the quidditch pitch where anyone could see them but the rest of the team would be long gone by now and even Summer had already gone so the chances of them getting caught were slim and he could tell that Ana didn’t want to wait, neither did he.

ANASTASIA MARISSA BELACQUA

Matt had never thought that he and Ana would end up talking about whether either of them wanted kids, they had been doing well at reinforcing any lines between them that became blurred now and then but this was different. This was helping him get to know her in a different way and he couldn’t deny that he liked the idea of getting a glimpse of what her life might end up looking like one day. He had been doing so well at keeping his personal life to himself but Ana made it easy to want to be honest with her when she asked a question outright like that and Matt knew that he didn’t want to keep the truth from her. “To be honest I’ve never really thought that much about it. I’ve been so focused on work since I graduated but there’s a part of me that does like the idea of becoming a dad one day,” he admitted. “It would be nice having a family of my own.” His sister was gone, his dad had never been in the picture and to this day Matt still had no idea who the guy was nor had he any desire to find out while his mom had died a couple of years after Karina. Matt was all alone in the world and had been for a long time but he couldn’t deny that there was a part of him that wanted to build a family of his own one day. His upbringing hadn’t been conventional at all but he liked the idea of having the chance to do things the right way at long last. “For what it’s worth, I think you’d be an amazing mum,” he admitted. Now Ana had him thinking about the possibility of having a family in the future it was always her that he imagined there with him but he knew that chances were it was probably never going to happen. His work didn’t really leave much room for dating, although admittedly part of that was his fault for turning down days off when they were offered to him, and the truth was that Matt wasn’t interested in anyone else anyway so for now all he could do was focus on protecting Ana. He knew there were some Guardians who had families of their own but that wasn’t his life right now and he wasn’t sure whether he would ever find someone else that he would want that with. He and Ana had never talked about what would happen if he ever took a day off and it hadn’t been an issue in the time that he had been her Guardian but she seemed curious and Matt was happy to answer her questions. “I can’t believe I’m saying this but I think it does,” he chuckled as Ana said she had noticed but not noticed if that made sense. “You mean you know I’m always around but hadn’t thought about the fact that I never take time off?” he asked, wanting to check that he understood her right. Either way it didn’t stop Ana from having more of a social life or dating though and even though he knew he would be incredibly protective and perhaps more than a little jealous if Ana did start seeing someone, Matt knew that he didn’t want her to put her life on hold either. “I have noticed, I just don’t want you to look back on this time later and have any regrets,” Matt said gently. It would kill him to see Ana with someone else but if that was what it took to make her happy then he knew that he would be supportive.

“You’re right about that but if it keeps you safe, I’ll do it,” Matt chuckled. He knew that he would always protect her no matter what the threat was, even if that ended up being her captain. Truth be told Matt knew that Summer would never actually hurt Ana but she had her ways of intimidating people, that was for sure. Matt and Summer went back a long way and they’d even played quidditch together while they were at Hogwarts so they knew each other at their best and their worst so he really wasn’t worried about anything happening while she was around but he still couldn’t resist joking about it with Ana nonetheless. Losing a sibling was something that he and Summer had in common and she was the only person in his life aside from his boss who knew what had happened to Karina until he decided that it was time to come clean to Ana. He had known that he could keep the truth from her but she had asked him outright and he had known that he hadn’t wanted to lie to her. No matter what happened between them he had always been honest with her and he knew that he wasn’t going to let that change now. “I know,” Matt sighed. “I couldn’t have left them even if I’d wanted to but it still doesn’t make me feel any less guilty,” he shrugged. He knew Ana was right, he wasn’t the one to blame for his sister’s death but he would always carry around the guilt of not being able to save her with him. He and Karina hadn’t always seen eye to eye but he had loved her. Their mom had been such a mess throughout their whole lives that for most of it Matt had often felt like it was just him and Karina against the world. Now she was gone and he felt completely alone and he wasn’t sure that he would ever be able to forgive himself for not being there for her when she needed him no matter how irrational that might be.

Matt was good at his job and he knew that he would always do everything in his power to keep Ana safe so he really didn’t want her putting her life on hold because they hadn’t found the person who had attacked her yet. He knew that was probably much easier said than done and it probably wasn’t that much different to what he was doing by throwing himself into his work but he wanted better for Ana. “I get it,” Matt said gently as Ana said that not knowing who did it drove her insane sometimes. “I’ll keep trying to find who attacked you and the other Guardians will too but please promise me you’ll at least try to get back to normality?” he asked, knowing that she deserved that much at least. If she didn’t want to try dating then Matt knew that he wasn’t going to try and force her into it but he knew that he didn’t want her to give up everything that she used to enjoy before she was attacked. He knew that she still had her family and her two best friends but Ana was still young and he really didn’t want her to wake up one day and wonder why she’d wasted so much time. “I know it is,” he chuckled as Ana said that it was mostly practice that made her not want to go out. She always trained so hard and he really couldn’t blame her for not wanting to go out and socialise afterwards. Matt knew that he needed to put a stop to what was happening between them and he was saying all the right things but the moment their lips met he found himself unable to pull away. The truth was that he didn’t want to reject Ana, he wanted to be with her and even the idea of losing his job altogether for breaking the rules or at least his assignment of protecting her wasn’t enough to give him the willpower to stop this. They had been behaving for such a long time but being close like this was almost too much and Matt knew that he didn’t want to hold back any longer. Matt had never done something like this in such a public place but in that moment he lost himself in the feeling of Ana’s lips and body against his and he finally gave into the desire for her that he’d kept at bay for such a long time.

---

Having accompanied Ana to practice so many times since becoming her Guardian, Matt had thought he’d known what to expect but he had certainly been proved wrong that day. Lying there afterwards, in that moment Matt was perfectly content. Ana’s head was resting against his chest and any worries he’d had that they might be seen had evaporated a long time ago. All that mattered in that moment was the two of them and even though Matt knew that it shouldn’t have happened, the truth was that he didn’t regret it. “I won’t forget it either,” he chuckled. “It’ll definitely give me something else to think about the next time I bring you here for practice,” he added with a grin. He always had time to himself while Ana was training and he knew that his thoughts would end up returning to what had just happened often. As Ana spoke again, Matt knew that he should be the responsible one and put a stop to it but he had promised himself that he was always going to try and be honest with Ana and that was a promise that he wanted to keep. “It wasn’t a mistake,” he said slowly. “I’ll never regret what just happened between us and I hope you won’t either,” he said gently, his eyes searching her face as he spoke. For a moment he wondered whether he should say the words he wanted to say to her but they left his lips before he could stop them anyway. “I love you, Ana,” he breathed, knowing that he couldn’t stand to keep that to himself a moment longer.

ANASTASIA MARISSA BELACQUA